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<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Jokes Facebook Status 
</p>
<p>Brighten the day of your friends by posting new facebook jokes every day. Jokes are for making 
</p>
<p>every one laugh with you. Get the funniest facebook jokes of all times and share with friends on 
</p>
<p>this platform. If you are in humorous mood then also make your friends smile by sharing funny 
</p>
<p>facebook pranks with them.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Dear Google: They are only using you to get to me. Sincerely Wikipedia
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I hate people who steal my ideas, before I think of them.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>How to make a woman go mmmmmmm all nite long? &#8230;&#8230;&#8230;&#8230;&#8230;&#8230;&#8230;&#8230;.. with Duct Tape :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Is it rude to throw a breath mint in someone&#8216;s mouth while they are talking?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>FACT: Kissing burns 5.4 calories a minute&#8230;&#8230; Ummm, wanna work out?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Whatever you do always give 100% &#8230;.. Unless you are donating blood :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I&#8216;m not weird. I&#8216;m limited edition.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I never let my best friend do stupid things &#8230; alone.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>We are best friends. Always remember that if you fall, I will pick you up &#8230;&#8230;.. after I finish 
laughing :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I did in the bed. I did it on the couch. I did it in the car. Texting is such an obsession. :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not 
</p>
<p>stop until you get into the office.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Don&#8216;t steal, don&#8216;t lie and don&#8216;t cheat. The government hates competition.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>How to sleep faster: Decorate your bedroom to look like a classroom.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Dear parents, we know money doesn&#8216;t grow on trees, that&#8216;s why we are asking you for it.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I&#8216;m not stalker. I am an unpaid private investigator.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I have a date tonight, with my bed. We are totally gonna sleep together.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Instead of single as a marital status, it should read independently, owned and operated :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Congratulations &#8230; You are the 100th person to view my status. To see your prize please click 
Control + W.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Viagra is now available in powder form to put in your tea. It does not enhance your performance 
</p>
<p>but it does stop your biscuit going soft. Lolz
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I really need a day in between Saturday and Sunday :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Laughing is the best medicine but if you are laughing for no reason, you need medicine.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Question of the Day: When you wait for a waiter in a restaurant, aren&#8216;t you a waiter?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Death is God&#8216;s way of saying you are fired. Suicide is humans way of saying, I quit.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>My family says I talk in my sleep but nobody at work has ever mentioned it. Lolz
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>There are only two kinds of people in this world: Doctors and Patients :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Boyfriend: Do you think my salary is sufficient for you? Girlfriend: It&#8216;s sufficient for me but 
how will you survive?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I don&#8216;t always lose my phone but when I do its always on silent :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>We love Facebook but we hate the face of book.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Dear math, Im not therapist so solve your own problems.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Today&#8216;s Joke! A Girl said &#8230;&#8230;.. TRUST ME :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The 3 fastest means of communication: telephone, television and tell a woman.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I&#8216;m not sure how much longer I can hide the fact that I&#8216;m a robot.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>You wanna see a perfect relationship? Watch a movie. Lolz
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Dear Facebook, Just wait, one day they will leave you too. Sincerely, ORKUT
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Men are like buses. One comes every 15 minutes.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>My wifi suddenly stop working then I realized that my neighbors have not paid the bill. How 
</p>
<p>irresponsible people are.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Insert coin to view my status messages.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Did anyone ever notice that &#8213;STUDYING&#8214; is a mixture of STUDY and DYING?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Perfect boyfriend : Does not drink, does not smoke, does not cheat and also Does not exist :P
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Facebook is the second most popular word that starts with &#8215;F&#8216; and ends with &#8215;K&#8216; :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>You Don&#8216;t realise how many clothes you have, until you wash them.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Never make the same mistake twice. There are so many new ones to make.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>You have lot of curves and I have no brakes ;)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I haven&#8216;t slept for ten days, bcoz that would be too long.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Bitch also stands for beautiful, intelligent, talented and charming human being.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Why do U think I SMS You? Is it because I care? Or I miss You? Or I love You? Or I need You? 
</p>
<p>No ! It&#8216;s because I need a person for just time pass. :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If at first you don&#8216;t succeed, cheat, repeat until caught, and then lie!
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I was good at math before they decided to mix the alphabet in it.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Sometimes at home I talk in my sleep, but at school I sleep while others are talking.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I don&#8216;t understand how Super Mario can smash blocks with his head but dies when he touches a 
turtle.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Taking revenge is wrong&#8230; very very wrong&#8230; But very very fun&#8230;
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It&#8216;s not fair that some men should be happier than others.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>A hot secretary came angrily out Of boss cabin. Her colleague asked: What Happened? You 
</p>
<p>went inside in a happy mood. She replied: He asked me are you free tonight? I said absolutely 
</p>
<p>free. That bastard gave me 45 pages to type!
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>They say that alcohol kills slowly. So what? Who&#8216;s in a hurry?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Hey, you have eyes, I have eyes, we have a lot in common!
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Men are like parking spaces; The good ones are taken, and the only ones left are handicapped.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>You can&#8216;t put a price tag on love, but you can on all its accessories.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Some people talk in their sleep. Lecturers talk while other people sleep.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I promised my friends that I wouldn&#8216;t date bad girls anymore.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I heard you took an IQ test and they said you&#8216;re results were negative.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Save a horse, ride a cowboy.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Please help the homeless. Take me home with you.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>My parents told me: &#8213;You&#8216;ve got to stop watching so much TV, and read more!&#8214; so I turned on 
the subtitles.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Insert coin to view my status message.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If women ruled the world there would be no wars. Just a bunch of jealous countries not talking to 
</p>
<p>each other.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I thinks my neighbor just caught me stealing his Wi-Fi internet.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>It&#8216;s funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged. It&#8216;s like asking someone, if suicide 
is better or being murdered.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Ladies first. Pretty ladies sooner. :)
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I want you to have a candle-lit dinner and say those magical three words to you &#8230;&#8230;&#8230;&#8230; &#8213;Pay 
The bill&#8214;
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>My friend wants to know if you think I&#8216;m hot.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Excuse me, if I go straight this way, will I be able to reach your heart?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Worrying works! 90% of the things I worry about never happen.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>God must love stupid people. He made SO many.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and 
</p>
<p>for the same reason.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If Facebook is like dating, then Twitter is like a one night stand &#8211; it&#8216;s fun while you&#8216;re doing it, 
you finish in like 5 minutes, and you feel real cheap afterwards.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Lary is wondering if they could invent a self cleaning oven, why can&#8216;t they invent a self cleaning 
house?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If vegetarians eat only vegetables, what about humanitarians?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Facebook is the adult way of having imaginary friends.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Good friends will bail you out of jail. Best friends will be sitting in the cell with you, laughing 
</p>
<p>about how awesome that just was.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I never make the same mistake twice. Three, four times maybe. But never twice.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Facebook, because time isn&#8216;t going to kill itself.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Just finished deleting some friends on Facebook, if you can read this then you got lucky.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Is there a rehab for Facebook addiction?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Stealing other people&#8216;s statuses on Facebook is called a Facelift.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I never get mad when i see my ex with someone else because i was always taught to recycle my 
</p>
<p>old trash.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I had my DNA analyzed. It came back with four main components. Bacon, Chocolate, Coffee &amp; 
</p>
<p>Crazy.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of my life, If I die next Tuesday.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a ten year married man looks 
</p>
<p>happy, we wonder why.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Women are like police, they can have all the evidence in the world but they still want a 
</p>
<p>confession.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>When someone adds me as a friend on Facebook, the first thing I do is go through all their 
</p>
<p>pictures.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Rumors are carried by haters, spread by fools, and accepted by idiots..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Bad decisions make good stories. No wonder people find me so entertaining..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I hate when my mind wont shut up when I&#8216;m trying to sleep..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If there is no chocolate in heaven&#8230;&#8214;I AM NOT GOING&#8214;.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Dear smartphones, why can`t you charge yourself? Sincerely, you`re not so smart after all.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If you want to commit suicide, you should jump down from your ego to your IQ.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>It used to be, &#8213;Can I have your number&#8214;? Now it&#8216;s, Do you have Facebook..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>just found out that if you hold Ctrl and w for 10 seconds it turns your Facebook page from Blue 
</p>
<p>to Red
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I think all woman can agree that bigger is better. Nobody wants a small bank account
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Tired of everyone talking about their feelings on Facebook lol..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>You don&#8216;t have to like me, I&#8216;m not a Facebook status.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Sleep is so cute when it tries to compete with the internet&#8230;
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If people could read my mind, I&#8216;d get punched in the face a lot.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Finally found out that the plant I&#8216;ve been watering isn&#8216;t real&#8230;
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>One of my mom&#8216;s rules growing up was never to write on walls, well apparently Facebook 
doesn&#8216;t have that rule.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Ah, Facebook, where it is socially acceptable to talk to a wall&#8230;
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If someone throws a rock at you, throw a flower back at them, but, make sure the flower is still 
</p>
<p>in the pot..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Laziness is my middle name.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Dear Ceiling Fan, If you could hold my weight, i would never be bored again. Sincerely, Bored.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Between Facebook texting, tweeting and email, I haven&#8216;t spoken a word in the last 3 years.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Men are like BLUETOOTH connection, when UR beside them they stay connected but when 
</p>
<p>you are away they search for new devices.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>When you really want to slap someone, do it and say &#8213;mosquito.&#8214;
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Your time, energy and love is precious make sure that it is not wasted and preciously invested 
</p>
<p>when dating.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>It&#8216;s just Facebook, I wish people would keep it real and stop frontin.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, i am afraid of widths.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>You don&#8216;t have to like me, I&#8216;m not a Facebook status.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Congratulations!! You are the 100th person to view my status. To see your prize please click 
</p>
<p>Control + W.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I wish I could google &#8213;things to eat in my &#8213;fridge&#8214; so I wouldnt have to go downstairs and be 
disappointed.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Facebook is like jail, you sit around and waste time, write on walls, and get poked by people you 
</p>
<p>don&#8216;t know.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If people have a problem with u, always remember, it is THEIR problem..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Don&#8216;t be afraid to make mistakes..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>The first half of our life is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Vote Up Vote Down My Facebook wall is broken.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>All work and no play, will make you a manager.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If you try and don&#8216;t succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Why can&#8216;t shampoo and conditioner run out at the same time?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>It`s too late to apologize. The damage is done.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>you`re sorry ? that`s cool. go write a book about it and let someone who actually cares read it.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Why does paper beat rock? if you hold a paper in front of your face and i throw a rock at it who 
</p>
<p>wins?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>If bar tenders aren&#8216;t allowed to sell alcohol to drunk people, then McDonald&#8216;s shouldn&#8216;t be 
allowed to sell food to fat people.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>My friend has just updated his status saying. Is balancing on the edge of a cliff.. So i poked him.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I&#8216;m the kind of person who bumps into inanimate objects, says, Oops, I&#8216;m sorry. And doesn&#8216;t 
stop to ask himself why he&#8216;s talking to a wall.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Next time someone presses the elevator button you&#8216;ve already pressed, act totally impressed and 
tell them they did it waaaay better than you..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>thinks that facebook should change the status question from &#8213;what&#8216;s on your mind?&#8214; to &#8213;what&#8216;s 
your problem today?&#8214;
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Women are like boats: they require constant maintenance and attention, and they cost a lot of 
</p>
<p>money. Men are like buses: another one will eventually come along.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Math questions are so stupid! They&#8216;re like &#8213;If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 6 in the other, 
what do I have?&#8214; Oh I dunno, a drinking problem maybe?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Beauty isn&#8216;t measured by outer appearance and what clothes we wear, but what we are inside 
..So, try going out naked tomorrow and see the admiration!
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>It&#8216;s raining, It&#8216;s pouring. Facebook is boring. I&#8216;m bored to death, I&#8216;m going to bed, hopefully 
we&#8216;ll meet in the morning!
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Do you know why a previous relationship is called EX? It`s not the term for the past. EX is short 
</p>
<p>for EXpired..
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>That awkward moment when you say goodbye to someone and you end up walking in the same 
</p>
<p>direction.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Why do you talk so fast?&#8214; &#8213;Why do you listen so slow?&#8214;
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>I don`t have a bad handwriting, I have my own font.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Life is hard normally, but its harder if you are Stupid.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Hey, I found your Nose, it was in my business again.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Never Say Neverrr, you just said it twice ?
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Is your name Summer.? because you are as hot as hell.  
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
<div style="page-break-before:always; page-break-after:always"><div><p>Love Facebook Status 
</p>
<p>Let the most wonderful feeling love, expressed in words with facebook love status of our site. 
</p>
<p>You can find facebook love greetings and love wishes here which will help you in sharing your 
</p>
<p>feelings in perfect words.
</p>
<p>x--------------------x--------------------x 
 </p>

</div></div>
</body></html>